Neverwhere’s Universe

The power of Love -Raven´s and Matteo´s story

Lyrics: Kansas “Carry on Wayward Son” (text & music Kansas, Jeff Glixman)

Excerpt: https://genius.com/Kansas-carry-on-wayward-son-lyrics

[Intro]
Carry on, my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more

[Verse 1]
Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high
Though my eyes could see, I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think, I still was a madman
I hear the voices when I'm dreaming
I can hear them say

[Chorus]
Carry on, my wayward son
There'll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don't you cry no more

Prologue: The beginning of the story

The Prophecy:

"A child, purest heart, highest light and love, two people with pure hearts having a child, purest form of love-extremely powerful in spellwork and magic. Power that could rule-or destroy- the world. A quest. The earth is drying up and there are rifts. The world needs balance to be restored. Balance will come through divine counterparts, 144 000 couples, stepping up and into their separate and mutual missions to help heal the world. This upcoming season will be significant because many counterparts will find eachother and they will each have a part to play in order for the world to change."

Episode 1: My journey so far- Raven´s story

I am a modern witch by blood and experience. I have been learning my whole life about the darker sides/aspects of people. My environment and the environment I grew up in has made me very independent and I hardly trust anyone. But even though I have seen and been through some of the darker sides of life , I am not dark-instead I embody light. I have managed to keep my heart pure, hopeful and light despite everything I have been through. For some reason my heart hasn´t changed although most people have a hard time believing it. I am a walking contradiction-it´s like the darker my past-the brighter my light. I take what I am given and change it into light.

My lineage of witches, healers, shamans and magicians

My family wasn´t the same-many turned to the darker sides of life and the craft. Especially my mother-she got consumed by the dark and eventually left this world. I was estranged and cast out by the rest of my lineage with a few exceptions.

There are a few that has chosen to become healers of the light and some of my ancestors have a strong intuition and clairvoyant gifts. Some are mediums, but some have chosen to use the mediumship to dig out dark energies that they use in their quest to be more powerful. Some also use dark spells to gain power and other benefits.

My lineage has always been strong when it comes to spiritual gifts and skills out of this world, but many has turned to the dark instead of the light. My family has shamans, magicians , healers and all other kinds of magical and spiritual people in it, but the people that use or did use their gifts for power, money and control instead of the service for all people-they are many.

My spiritual gifts and my magical powers

My power lies in my intuition, my resilience, my prophetic gifts and my ability to control the elements. I am also a healer and I am a master transmutor. My gifts are clairaudience and clairvoyancy. I also sometimes feel things in my physical body-I guess it´s a kind of clairsentience. I am highly sensitive to people´s energies and I often can tell what people´s deeper desires are. I see their deeper motives and drives. This gift came through a traumatic childhood where I had to sharpen my senses in order to survive and stay safe. I left home early and I have been on my own since then. The only thing I own is a beat up motorcycle. I never stay in a place for long. I make my living through helping people with my gifts. Even though my journey has been hard I still somehow have kept my heart pure and I love wholeheartedly, when I love someone.

I also have the power of making potions, control the elements-elemental power. My skillset also includes spellwork, but my strongest gifts are clairvoyance and elemental powers. When I need to recharge I often spend time by a body of water or in the forest among the trees. I need to protect myself with a shield of sorts when I am around a lot of people, because other people´s energes and desires are very clear to me. I try not to get too involved, but I can read people and all of those things sometimes are draining my energy and it clutters my mind. I try not to expose myself to people unless I need to. I am a wanderer and I like to be alone.

My perception of time

Time-in my world-is circular and neverending. That´s why I have a an Infinity symbol tattooed on my wrist-alongside a portal and the rune Algiz, which stands for protection. I think we can experience many timelines at once. I believe that time is just a construction and that we humans live in several realities and timelines at the same time.

I sometimes find that I can create portals to other timelines or places, but I haven´t mastered the skill of timetravelling or teleportation completely yet. I have no control over when it happens. Usually when I need it, a portal appears to me, but I can´t choose to open one with my will-maybe I will be able to-someday. And I never know where the portal is taking me, so it´s risky and dangerous.

Episode 2: My visions and my dreams intensifies and things change

Four years ago, I felt a change in the energies surrounding me and I started to have visions of a person- a man. He is a restless soul that makes his living through creating art, taking pictures and making documentaries of different kind. He is a person that is quite welI-known, but I don´t know him in person-yet. I just know that I need to find him. Don´t ask me how I know this-I just know-I can feel it.

My visions of this man, gradually become more intense and my body start feeling these intense feelings. The visions become interactive and I feel like we have real talks, even though everything is done in a telepathic sort of way. These talks make me feel like I am in love…..and I know how strange this may sounds-you would probably say that I imagine it all and that I am about to loose my mind. But in my reality these things are quite normal.

At first even I was sceptical, everything changed though, when this person started to appear in my nightly dreams too.

At one time, when I was travelling around in Europe, I went to Glastonbury in Great Britain and as I walked towards the tower-one of my spiritual guides told me that I need to find the man from my visions in real life, for the highest good of all mankind-no pressure, right? 🙂 Since that day in Glastonbury I have been in deep thought about it. I have been thinking about not going through with the search for that person. I wonder if it´s good to pursue this, because of the power of this prophecy and impact it can potentially have. I also have thought a lot about the danger the world will be in, if this kind of power gets to the wrong people. But I may not have a choice in this matter, since it´s my destiny and my responsibility….

Episode 3: An introduction of my soulmate to be

My counterpart-I know him through media and his creativity, but we are separated by circumstances and I don´t know how far he has come in his journey-if he knows or senses me… I know a bit about the prophecy-we are destined to bring to life, but I am not sure about how much he knows. A shaman, who´s in my lineage, told me a long time ago about this Prophecy and for the longest time I didnt believe him, because I didn´t sense anything then. This shaman also told me about the impact and the power of a union between me and my counterpart. Part of the prophecy also talks about a child-the child that we are destined to have together. Our union will make us targets of all of the world’s leaders.

Maybe it was because of the gravity of it all, that I didn´t believe in the Prophecy, but then, four years ago, I started to sense this man and then the visions started-the visions of our potential future. When people talk about couples that are soulmates and that their destiny is written in the stars…I never expected that I was meant for that kind of sacred and deep love. I have always been a lone wolf and I thought that I would continue being alone for the rest of my days, but some higher power has other ideas on that notion….

I have to find a way to get to my person-if I choose to, by myself though. The only thing I have is my motorcycle, my magical powers, my intuition and a weird feeling of love that is so strong that it literally can change the timeline. At least I know it because the feelings that I have are strong, but they make no sense, since this man and me-we don´t know eachother and we are worlds apart in all kinds of ways.

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Episode 4: And so our story begins….

Me and my- potential lover? partner?-whatever I will call him- have a mission to accomplish, but we don´t really know exactly what it entails yet. We are not the only ones though-there are other unions with the same impact. But this will make all of us targets. 144 000 couples that need to move in silence and they need to be very discerning when it comes to who they trust. There are snakes in the grass everywhere and you never know who is friend and who is foe. The mission requires everyone to sharpen their spiritual, material and otherworldly gifts.

For some reason I hava a vague vision of a battle-the ultimate battle between good and evil…Sometimes I have trouble of believeing my own visions and then I need to get confirmation in other ways too. It sounds so cliché though-the ultimate battle of good and evil…Well I guess the answers will be revealed when the time comes. For now-I will make my way to try and find the potential love of my life and see what he knows…if anything..

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Episode 5: Next stop Venice

I leave for Venice. My journey starts in London and the trip goes smoothly. I don´t make a lot of stops on the way. It´s summer. For some reason I get a feeling that I need to be in Venice before august 8:th- The Lions Gate Portal will be open then and it´s a pivotal time for magical things to happen and right now I really need a miracle…

Once I get to Venice I don´t know what I will do -I´ll just have to trust that I will be shown my next step from there…

I have never been to Venice, despite all my travels around Europe and beyond, but it´s with mixed emotions I am taking this journey-it´s “make or break-time”…I can only pray for assistance on the way-whether in the physical or in the unseen realms…..

Magical portals

Do you remember that I said that I can open portals, but I don’t have any control of  that ability….?

Well…..I drive my motorcycle fast and I don’t really notice anything that happens around me. I just want to reach my destination as fast as possible, when suddenly a portal opens right in front of me and I get sucked in. I have no time to react -my motorcycle tilts over- completely out of control. I lose control over its trajectory and I fly over the handlebars. I find myself flying into thin air. The speed makes me pass out.

When I come to  my senses I realize that I am lying on wet sand. I hear waves crashing against a shore somewhere close by. It’s nighttime and I don’t know where I am. All I see is a sky full of stars and the ocean in front of me.

I  see a man standing with his back against me looking at the waves. He holds a film camera in his hand and is deeply focused on something he sees-some plankton shines brightly and lights up the ocean like a myriad of stars or fireflies. 

I am trying to come back to my senses and try to stand up. I am still a bit disoriented and brush the wet sand out of my clothes. I don’t seem to have injured myself-fortunately. As I said-the portals can be dangerous….but I have never experienced one opening without me doing anything. I pick my motorcycle up, when I suddenly feel something warm and tingly. 

I realize that the man I  see suddenly is aware of me being there. He’s slowly turning around to look at me. The world stops for a second when our eyes meet. I have to catch my breath-this man is the most beautiful man I have ever seen-from the tattoos all over his arms and legs, to his incredible sparkling blue eyes. It looks like a whole universe is mirrored in those eyes. I freeze where I stand. He looks into my eyes and I feel like I am struck by lightning. His eyes look at me and he gives me a dreamy halfsmile. I can’t move because of the flood of emotions that rushes through me. We look at each other for something that feels like an eternity, when I suddenly get janked back through the portal to where I was before. The portal closes and disappears and I am left standing on an empty road with my motorcycle beside me.

What just happened??? What was that??? What on earth is going on?

 With my heart racing and legs shaking,  I continue my trip towards Venice- really confused and a lot shaken up.

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Episode 6: Matteo enters the realms of the story

Dreamy visions of someone familiar-Matteo´s point of view

I am standing on a beach in Wales filming the luminescent plankton. It´s a beautiful night and the sky is full of stars. I feel pure joy, just by being there all alone and I also feel blessed to have been given this life and these opportunities. I was raised by parents who travelled a lot for work-they were both journalists and photographers. They dragged me around the world and I learned a lot about nature and space from them. They covered stories from all over the world, but were particularly drawn to people and places where a lot of things happened. Unfortunately they died in a car accident a few years ago. 

I am an only child, but I was raised with a lot of love and care-even though we sometimes were in dangerous places. My parents also taught me a lot about taking what you got-whether it was tools or food from nature-and make it something useful. I have learned about surviving on what I can find. I am a practical person and I also always have had a lot of energy so my parents put me in martial arts classes and all kinds of athletic activities. 

I am a restless traveller-often travel by motorcycle- and I film a lot of nature and animal life. I like my freedom and that’s why I don’t work a 9 to 5-job. Instead I work as a freelancer in many areas, but my favourite thing is to film at night-time-at a  beach or in a high place. I have always loved the night sky and also the beach. 

People call me a lone wolf, but I never have had problems connecting with people. I am quite sociable when I feel like it. I am single and not really looking for love. One day I want to find someone special, that resonates with my soul-I am all about having a certain feeling -a special connection-when I meet that someone. I am a bit of a romantic, because I believe in soulmates and a destined love.

I write poetry sometimes. I write texts about true love and destiny-a bit too sentimental and kitsch-I know, but I like it. I have published some of my writing on a semi-famous publishing company. I also like to draw portraits of people-just for fun. I do it to relax and often when I am staying in a place longer I like to go out to study people in ordinary situations and draw them. I sometimes use watercolors too.

In the last few years I have had a lot of weird dreams about a woman-I don´t know what she looks like-I only know her green eyes and the ways she makes me feel. I don´t know if she´s an angel or a dream but I hope she’s real and lives somewhere in the world looking for me. As I said-I am a romantic at heart and at the core of my being.

I am filming in Wales for a while -mostly ocean life, but also I take pictures that I publish in magazines. All of my creative activities and work takes up most of my time. I have a lot to do and my services are quite in demand. I am lucky and blessed to be so successful. 

What the he** is going on?!

As I am filming the luminescent plankton something shifts in the air around me. I am so focused on filming that I don´t notice it at first. Suddenly I am aware that something feels different. I slowly turn around only to find myself lost in a pair of startled green eyes. Out of thin air a woman is standing on the beach with me. She´s so beautiful to me-all through the worn leather jacket  and the half-long and wavy auburn hair. She´s muscular and on the bigger side. All I see is her eyes  and all of my body is reacting. I feel like I am struck by lightning and all of my body gets hot. I feel excited-my body reacts in weird ways to the sight of her. She´s so beautiful with a kind of witchy vibe. 

The world stops for a moment as I look into her eyes. She feels like a dream and I wonder if I actually am too tired and starting to see things. 

I have never felt this way-my reaction is instant and undeniable. I just want to run towards her and take her in my arms. She feels familiar to me-like I know her already. She’s there, but for a moment when a portal, or so it seems, opens behind her and she disappears as suddenly as she arrived. One moment she´s there and in the next she suddenly disappears out into thin air again.

What the he**just happened??! Am I actually hallucinating-supernatural things like this is not something that usually happens to me. I am a very grounded and stable person, so what was I just experiencing?

I don´t know, but I do know that my life and my life´s trajectory just changed radically. Things will never be the same again. All I know is that I need to find this woman. I don’t know where to start though, but for now I will return to my hotel and think things over. 

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Episode 7: Venice-Raven

Disturbing dreams and a long sleep

When I finally arrive at the small family- owned hotel in Venice, where I am staying for the next couple of weeks, I am completely drained and fall asleep with my clothes on. I sleep for 12 hours straight. The shock and the worry about the fact that I couldn’t control the portal opening, weighs heavily on my mind. I even dream about it, but in my dreams I am not met by a beautiful man-instead I am looking at a wasteland with houses in ruins, no people and broken down cars and factories is all I see-it´s a disturbing and apocalyptic kind of view. I wake up all sweaty and scared. I hope that the dream isn’t some kind of premonition about the future to come. I have had  a lot of those kinds of dreams since I was very young, although I never talked about it with anyone-as I said, my closest family have chosen the dark side of the magical world. 

I dreamed about my mothers passing-or should I say vanishing- long before it actually happened. In my dream she was consumed by a spell she was trying to make-one that proved to hold a stronger power than she anticipated. It made her dissolve-not painfully, but a second she was there and then she wasn’t. The spell opened a rift in the ground, so she may have ended up dead or in another dimension or place-who knows. My dream turned out to be a reality. It happened just the way I had dreamed it would. I tried to warn my mother, but she never listened to me-I was the outcast child that had so much brightness and light in her, so my mother couldn´t stand the sight of me.

Lost in thoughts I try to pull myself together. I need to find some answers. I get a feeling that I will find some answers of what is going on-I just need a key-somewhere to start.

Inner knowing and intuitive insights

I know the man I saw at the beach is my so-called soulmate-my divine partner, but I am surprised about the reaction I had-I never expected that the attraction would be so instant and fiery. It really took my breath away and it´s also scary, because I am so used to being alone and only relying on myself. I don´t know what to do about that so I grab a bit of breakfast and decide to go out -maybe it will help clear my mind of all the clutter-I really need my mind to be sharp at this time.

Venice-day 1

In Venice there are a lot of hidden worlds and the magical community is quite large. There are secret places disguised and cloaked as stores and cafes and other stuff. I haven´t been here before, but I know that there is a particular book café that has some records about magical families and their powers. The owners have collected and recorded magical spells and rituals and have been asked to watch over this source of power. I get a feeling that I will find some answers of what is going on-I just need a key-somewhere to start. I don´t know where this café is located, but I know it´s called Midnight Books & Coffee. I google it and I find it´s not far from the hotel I am staying at. I am heading there. 

Midnight Books & Coffee

I want to find a way to meet my soulmate-to say hello for real, but the fact that the portal suddenly opened without me in control of it-at all-has got me spooked. I think I need to see if this is a phenomenon that has occurred earlier and if my family lineage has people in it that control portals. I need to learn how to control the appearing and disappearing of portals if I want to be able to use that kind of magic moving forwards. Otherwise I might not be so lucky and unharmed the next time this happens-who knows where I will end up….

The café turns out to be a cosy coffee shop with big fluffy comfortable chairs, a lot of carpets in different colors. It feels like walking into a living room, instead of a café. I really like the vibe-as soon as I step through the doors I notice a smell of sandalwood and orange-some of my favourite smells. 

The caféowner turns out to be a cheerful and vibrant woman dressed in orange and yellow and red-with curly red hair and smiling eyes. Her vibe is autumn and harvest time and I get a feeling that she’s probably good at making medicinal concocts and herbal tinctures. I think her magical powers are more earthy and of a healing kind. I think she´s a healer and a potionmaker. She has an earthy and grounded aura and she immediately makes me feel safe and comfortable. She probably puts a lot of effort and magic in the things she cooks and bakes too. 

Her husband is more like a distracted professor with his hair slightly unruly. His aura is harder to distinguish-he feels like an academic and he does research in the metaphysics and about the quantum fields and other things in the unseen worlds. I know he has written a lot of academic texts and books. It´s hard to see what kind of magic he wields, but I know he´s very good at the theory of things. He feels like a mentally really strong individual. Maybe he is good at protecting his energy and cloaking his mental powers. It feels like protective magic is his forté, but I can´t be sure. I am quite good at reading people-both of the magical community and others, but this time I am a bit confused, which probably means he´s very good at whatever he does. 🙂

Anyways, they both welcome me and help me find a quiet corner. I ask if they have any books about portals and time travel. To my surprise they´re both British-not Italian. Although I should have known that, since I have come across his writings before. The woman, Liza, brings me a cup of pumpkin latte and a cinnamon roll and then she sits down to talk a bit. The coffee shop is not so busy, since it’s in the middle of the week. 

Liza & Adrian-their story so far

As she sits down-I intuitively know that she and her husband are part of the 144 000 couples-the collective with missions to help better- and maybe even save the world-I realize how pretentious it may sound, but I know about it since I am part of that collective-or I am supposed to be anyway.

Liza and I talk a bit and she tells me they moved here and started the bookshop and café after they met at the university. I tell her a bit about myself, but not in so much detail. We don’t talk about the magical community, but I think she knows I am from a family of magicians and witches. She tells me she works as a healer, a herbalist and she reads tarot cards intuitively. 

I also do healing work so we have that in common, but she´s more practical than me- I mostly work with energy healing. She tells me that she gets the medicinal herbs from her parents’ gardens. Her mother and father are both gardeners and have a lot of knowledge about medicinal herbs and tonics-that´s where she refined  her skills-she´s has always been a natural healer, but she learned about plants and their properties from her parents. I sense that her hands have a lot of healing in them, so I think she just needs to touch someone and they instantly feel better.

Adrian joins us and as he sits down and looks at Liza I know that what they have is true  unconditional love-the love glows from them and it gets even stronger as they look into each other’s eyes and hold hands. As I see them together I know that he’s here to protect her and she’s here to protect his heart. Healers need protectors and as the world changes-we are all going to need people that can withstand the evil in the world and stand up for what is right.

Liza reads my future

Liza asks me if I want her to read tarot for me. She says it´s because she senses that I am going through something right now. I am intuitive, but for some reason I have a problem with reading cards or looking into my own future, so I take her up on her offer. 

A few times in my life I have had insights about myself and my future, but not all that often. I sometimes think I am blocking myself from seeing things, because sometimes I don’t want to see. I sometimes choose to look too at people , for instance, too positively. I am better at it nowadays, but I forget that many people these days only operate from an egotistical perspective. Something has happened to humanity throughout the years-things are not the same anymore and people are definitely not the same. But now my mind is drifting-sorry. I’ll get back to Liza’s reading for me.

As we sit down with a fresh cup of tea-Liza has made me fresh orange tea without asking, but she uses her powers to also read people’s preferences or what they need, as they enter the café.

–So, Raven she says-you just went through something that shook you up-a lot and I think it’s something that you never believed-even though you’ve heard about it before. You got confirmation on something you´ve been told about a long time ago…but you didn’t really believe it until now…This experience shocked you to the core and now you´re looking for more clues or information about it.

Her accuracy has me stunned, so I don´t say a word. 

– I think it´s time for you to acknowledge your feelings and your emotions about this, she says, continuing to look at her cards. Because if you don’t choose to do it or see it yourself-the universe/source/God will step in and do it for you. This is your destined path and it’s a powerful one. It’s the path that is meant for you and it’s going to make you happy. I sense that you sometimes have a hard time believing in happiness for yourself, but it´s time for you to be happy, she says with a seriousness as she looks at me. You are not meant to be alone anymore-someone or something was shown to you, so you can take the next steps. But you also have a mission to do and I think it´s quite a dangerous one so I am seeing love, happiness in your future, but also danger.

You are going to need someone to protect you too-you are meant to be with your soulmate at this time. There are a lot of bad energies with bad people around you and someone else-someone you love and have loved in several lifetimes.  

These are some “not-so-nice”, but powerful people-it feels like an organisation of sorts, but I can’t see it clearly. These people/this organisation are getting scared, so they want to destroy things and stop you from being with your soulmate. 

You and your destined soulmate are going to change the world together and someone doesn’t want that to happen. You both  bring unique gifts to this relationship and together you are unstoppable. I can´t see what you are meant to do though. I just feel the weight of it all…There will be danger around you two-you will have powerful enemies, but also you will find friends  just when you need them. Help can come from unexpected places and people-remember that. But please use your skills-your intuition and your craft to help guide you to the right people.

Here she stops and looks at me. I think that is all I can tell you now, she says, but beware of people-don´t trust just anyone, alright?

-Wow, that is some powerful stuff, she says… I don´t know who you are, but you have a heavy weight to carry. I just hope you´ll find your love soon, because you are going to need at least one person you can trust beyond doubt. 

Me giving Liza and Adrian a prediction

I rise up from the chair I am sitting in and thank her for her kindness and her reading. -I have a lot more to think about now, I say, but I at least feel a bit at ease after your confirmation. I thought I was imagining things or that my intuition couldn´t be trusted anymore, so thank you. I needed to hear those things today.

She smiles and says:

-Yeah, I had a feeling you might need a bit of help on your way.

As I stand up I suddenly get a vision and it comes with such strength that I need to sit down again. Blurry visions overflow my mind, but as I sit down again, I try to make sense of what I am  seeing.

Liza gets worried:

-What is it? she asks. Are you feeling ok?

-Yes, give me a minute…I think I have something I need to tell you and Adrian also, I say slowly. Can you please bring him here for a minute, I say. I need to talk to you both.

Liza brings Adrian and we find a new, more hidden corner in their coffee shop to sit down again. 

-So, I start…You have heard of the 144 000 couples I guess, the couples that are going to lead the way to a new kind of living in a better, more calm world?

They look at each other and say yes, they have heard of them. 

-Did you know that you are one of those couples? I ask.

Now they start to laugh-no that is not something that is for us they say. They laugh but Liza takes a look at my serious face and she stops laughing. 

-That´s not true, right? She says, less confidently now.

-We are just ordinary people, Adrian says. -We may have some gifts when it comes to seeing the future, discovering things or exploring new thinking patterns, but that  is all.

– No I say, your love is special-not many people love the way you do and you have open hearts that welcome weary travellers like myself. You also guard important history and that is significantly important, I continue. I just got flooded with visions and I may not have all the answers I say, but you two and this place is very significant as the times are changing. The world is a very unstable place right now where the people in power, or especially the people who gained power by underhanded actions are making moves to increase their power. I can only sense it, but I am sure that you two are a part of the 144 000 couples. Your purpose will soon be clearer, but I think you are supposed to keep on protecting the books and the information you have about all the magical lineages and the powers that the magical community have. 

I also believe that you may assist as a safe haven for people-somewhere they can turn if they run into problems. I think many people will gather here-like a meeting place or a hub to provide assistance in the upcoming struggles to come. My advice is that you be on the look-out for some more actual houses or places where people can stay safe-seek refuge. Here I end my monologue.

Liza and Adrian look at me with disbelief-You´ve gotta be kidding me, right? Adrian asks.

-No, I am afraid not, I answer,  but you know that I only see glimpses and this is just one thing that may happen, but I am certain that you are one of the 144 000. I felt it as soon as I came through the doors to this café. I know this, because I have been told the same thing about myself, but I didn´t believe it either-but I know now who I must find to continue my own journey.

After all these revelations I tell them I will get back to them in the morning to look at my family tree and see if I can learn something that I can use, from my ancestors.

To be continued…

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Episode 8: Matteo’s making plans for his next move and does a lot of research.

Wales

As I go back to the hotel that night I am utterly confused and at the same time intrigued. I admit this whole experience has been a bit too supernatural for my taste, but since I am a creative I have an open mind, but I am still in shock.

That woman-another aspect of the weirdness of this- is that I think I know her or rather I know her from my dreams. Maybe this was another dream? Maybe I was half asleep and dreaming?

When I finally fall asleep it´s morning. I have a dreamless sleep-or at least I can´t remember any of my dreams. I get up  and grab something to eat at a cozy café I´ve discovered. I have a bit of photography to do today, to finish up this job that I am on, but after that I decide to go back to the hotel to do some research and also to check my mail.

At a whim I start looking into spirituality and watch videos that I find online. There is a lot of information and a lot of different kinds of people out there I realize-some  makes sense but not all. My martial arts classes have taught me to be still and find stillness inside. I also have learned to trust my gut feeling-or my intuition- and that comes in handy right now, as I do research-mostly about portals, time-travel, spiritual connections and a bit of magic. I realize that this is kind of a big deal for many people, but mostly I realize that people have the kind of dreams that I have-it´s not uncommon. This surprises me. I find a lot of testimonies about how people dream about important people and then they meet, but my interest soon zeroes in on dreaming of future partners or soulmates. Is that what she is-this woman-my soulmate? Does she even exist for real-I thought she just might be a figment of my imagination, but what if she’s not? What if she really exists? If she is my soulmate -the physical and emotional reaction I had as I saw her would certainly explain it…But how on earth do I even find her, if she exists?

All the information I have dug up makes me a bit tired, but I need to check my mail, because  the project that I was working on with the luminescent plankton and the wildlife here in Wales, is coming to an end. I need to see if I have some other work lined up for me.

Not surprisingly-there are a few emails in my inbox. I swiftly read through them and a few of them pique my interest. There is  a job in Italy that sounds interesting and there is a job in France that sounds fun-both jobs is about filming the ocean life and also someone has requested me to film, and document, an expedition at sea for a few weeks. I have to think about which project I am going to follow. But for now I need to sleep-so badly, so I lay down on the bed and instantly fall asleep. 

I wake up screaming in a cold sweat, in the middle of the night. An intense nightmare just  ambushed me-it was horrible-I felt like I was drowning and I saw her in the ocean next to me, but she wasn’t breathing…a weird kind of portal had opened up beneath her at the bottom of the ocean, but the view through that portal showed me a deserted and completely destructed world-no people, just  a deserted city with empty cars and buildings. That in itself was enough as far as nightmares go…Somebody had pushed me and her in the ocean, but she looked so strange-like all life had been sucked out of her…she looked like an empty shell… I go up and take a shower. What was the dream about? And why is this woman entering my dreams time and time again? I really need to find her and see if she’s real, but where do I start? I can’t go back to sleep, so I make myself a cup of coffee and sit down by the computer again.

I have a lot on my mind and I can´t seem to sort my thoughts out. How do I even start to find this woman-if she even exists…Magic isn´t usually a part of my daily life and my routines…I laugh to myself…I never thought I would be in a situation like this…Am I just overworked? Is that why my world has changed so suddenly? Am I losing my mind?

I start to do new searches on the computer and I hope inspiration or insights will come out of it. I usually start things like this-pick up one thread and see where it leads me. Many times I solve my next steps this way. I guess I am always driven by creativity and inspiration. Suddenly an inspiring and interesting article about Venice appear on my screen-I think I had someone who wanted to hire me for a project there…was it the one with the boat expedition…?

Yes, maybe…I decide to write back to the people who e-mailed me and ask a bit more about the project. I think they were some kind of organisation….wildlife and preserves or something like that…I send them an e-mail and then I decide to look more into the background of the organisation.  Research is important-I need to know a bit about the people I am working with, so I don´t get  caught up in some sort of predicament because of their beliefs or hidden agendas. I use my intuition-or my gut feeling to screen projects and people, with a little help from the internet of course :-), but I also know how much false information there is out there. My intuition is seldom wrong and it has helped me to back out of unethical projects  and stuff like that.

I also have contacts in higher places and organisations because of me and my parents way of living. We made quite a few interesting and useful acquaintances along the way. I have kept in touch with many of my parent´s friends and colleagues after my parents death. Many work in newspapers all over the world and I even have a few contacts in intelligence organisations too. This has proved to be useful for me, because some high profile people sometimes hire me for freelance work and then I can ask my contacts and friends about them. My contacts can´t always tell me things, but sometimes I get help when I need it. I make friends easily and it´s helpful in my line of work.

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Episode 9: Finding out more about my lineage and visions of past lives-Raven

Venice day 2

As I wake up the next morning-I decide to have brunch at “Midnight Books & Coffee”. I hope to look at the files for my lineage in their ancestry books of magical heritage. 

As I enter the café, Liza is there and she welcomes me with the same warmth as yesterday.

-Let’s see, she says and looks at me with an inquisitory look…. How about hot mint cocoa with some cream and chocolate sprinkles?

I am as surprised as yesterday at her accuracy. I laugh and say:

-You really do know about people’s desires, don´t you? 

She smiles warmly with a mischievous look in her eyes and brings me cocoa and a simple grilled cheese sandwich. I ask her if she could help me find my family’s book of lineages after I had my breakfast. She promises she will. 

The café is really busy today with a lot of students running around. It´s the start of the semester in the universities now, so it´s a lot of people everywhere trying to buy books and stuff they need for their studies.

While I wait for things to be less busy, I browse through the book store and I randomly pick a book from a shelf. I realize it´s a poetry book about love. I am not an avid reader, but I actually like poetry, because it´s a language where you read between the lines and get to have your own interpretation of things. I have never liked to be “put in a box” when it comes to who I am, even though many people think they have me all figured out.”Oh, well it´s that big, motorcycle-riding, odd woman. She does a lot of weird things. There must be something wrong with her, since she doesn’t seem to be fitting in anywhere. She thinks she´s all that and all-mighty, all-knowing. I don´t like her”.

You don´t know how many times I have heard people talking about me in that kind of way-especially other women- they seem to be triggered by me. It was the same with my own mother. She hated me very much, since I couldn´t be defined or “put in a box”. I was always a peculiar kind of child, introverted and never said anything or asked for anything. 

My thoughts always run around like this and I get so easily distracted, so I find myself standing holding the poetry book in one hand, while I get lost in my train of thought. I try to shake myself out of my walk down memory lane and look at the author: Matteo Sinclair-I laugh to myself. Why am I even surprised?! Things like this always happen to me. Of course-of all the freaking books in a Bookstore I have to pick out the one that is written by my so-called soulmate…I shake my head….and decide to buy the book. I guess it came to me for a reason.

Liza finally seems to have a bit of time, so she takes me into a big beautiful room with a lot of shelves and books everywhere. I curiously look around and see a lot of paintings and old maps that are framed in lovely gold frames of the lighter kind. The walls are painted in bright yellow, but it´s not overwhelming. There is also a kind of an archive in big light brown drawers. Around the room there are nice reading nocks and there is also a nice comfy sofa and some stuffed chairs sitting by different kinds of tables. The room is decorated in gold, green and red-it kind of feels like an old type of library, but with light and bright colors. I instantly feel at home here.

Liza shows me the archive and she starts to look after my family´s book of heritage. 

-Your last name is Moonshadow right? 

-Yes, but my family changed their name from La Lune in the 16-hundreds, I say.

-Oh, so your family is from a really old lineage, right?

-Yes, but most choose the dark way instead of the light way, so our lineage isn´t really known for their charitable heart and nice ways, I answer.

-I see, she says while looking at me. But you have chosen to live by the light, right? I don´t see any darkness in your aura.

I almost cry at her words-many people have assumed that I am exactly like the rest of my family, so I am very grateful she sees the truth. People haven´t really given me the benefit of  a doubt in the magical community. I have always been an outcast and a loner because of it. It has scarred me in some ways, but I am good at changing darkness into light-especially when it comes to my past traumas and all my emotions.

I smile at her, grateful that she is such a wonderful and warm person and I feel she always gives people the benefit of the doubt. She is one of those rare souls that see people for who they truly are. I guess that´s why she is so good at predicting people´s desires and wants in the café. I guess she uses this skill in many situations and in her craft.

After she has found my family’s archive and the books I need, she leaves me alone to explore and read. I am especially curious to find out if any of my ancestors have had the ability to control portals-namely open, close them or control where they open to.

I get submerged in my books, so I don´t really notice the feeling of change in the room…but I hear a whoosh sound and suddenly I feel cold. I look up from my book and I realize that I have been pulled through another portal.

-Oh no, not again….I groan. 

I find myself in a dark room. It´s really cold and there is a storm going on outside the window-which is an old-fashioned kind with several squares put in a window frame. In front of me there is a gigantic fireplace which has a roaring fire in it. It crackles really nicely. The room is filled with the smell of oranges and carnations or some other spicy aroma. I curiously look around and the room I am in. It looks like a  library from the late eighteenth century. The room has book shelves of oak or some other heavy wood. I am standing in the back of the room -in the shadows.

In front of the fireplace there are two stuffed chairs and a small table. On the mantelpiece there are two tall candelabras that are lit. It should be a cozy kind of vibe, but my intuitive senses pick up on something else-a hidden despair, an urgency and a longing that almost knocks me off balance. In one of the chairs a young woman is sitting and she is crying silently. I have to look again-the woman looks just like me when I was younger. Have I entered a space in time where one of my ancestors is residing or is it something else…? 

I look at the woman, but suddenly I am pulled in and I am her. I feel the despair, the longing, the urgency and what is this other feeling-it’s hidden deep inside the heart-this feeling…is it love? I feel like my heart is about to break and I feel myself starting to cry profusely. I can´t seem to be able to stop…I just want somebody-someone special-to ease my despair by holding me. I need someone to comfort me and hold me with true love in their heart…In my mind  a face suddenly appears-this face looks familiar and it makes me feel a need that I have never felt before. This face belongs to someone I love and care about deeply…

I’m really confused, because it´s like I am two people at once, but still the same…I am this woman and the contemporary me-all at once. How is this possible and what is this feeling I have?

The face that has appeared in my mind, is my soulmate Matteo Sinclair, but at the same time it’s not the one I know from my time…It´s like I am feeling the same thing but for two versions of the same man.

Someone is suddenly interrupting my thoughts. Someone is barging into the library and it really freaks me out. Someone scary is approaching me-or us-depending on how you look at it. Someone that awakens a primal fear inside of me….-someone is really about to hurt me…

I feel the fear paralyzing me. There is a man- a very drunk man-much older than the woman/me-this man is storming into the room 

–You are going to come to bed with me you whore. Nobody is sleeping with my wife. I am not going to be made a fool of in this household!

The woman/me can´t move.

He picks up a firepoke of metal and is suddenly striking me in the head-he strikes again-this time over my back and I can feel the bones are breaking. The pain is excruciating. It hurts so much that I lose consciousness. The last thing I see is another man rushing in between us and then I pass out…

When I wake up again Matteo of that time is lying beside me and he is bleeding from a gunshot in the chest. My husband is holding a small pistol in his hand and is triumphantly cackling:

-Ha, I got you good this time. Now you can´t be with my wife anymore…

He locks completely mad and I feel myself hurling towards the gun and caught by surprise my “husband” ends up shooting me in the chest.

The last thing I do before I pass out again is grabbing Matteo’s hand and then I am gone…

The pain of everything is flowing through me, but before ”I” die I am pulled back through the portal into Liza’s and Adrian´s café again.

As I come through the portal, my body is still aching, but fortunately I am not shot. My back really hurts though, but no bones are broken. For a long while I can´t move, probably because of the shock. I am just lying there when Adrian enters the room and he calls out for Liza.

-Liza, come I need help! He sounds a bit freaked out. I must look like such a mess when I am lying on the floor, unable to get up. I don´t know if any injuries are visible on my body either. I feel really weird and suddenly I pass out again.

Episode 10: Matteo´s making a discovery-Matteo

Another weird dream

I send some e-mails to my friends about the organizations that have offered me freelance work-just to see if any of them can give me any further information. I am choosing between France and Italy at the moment, but I want to know more before I sign anything.

Since I have slept so badly I decide to try and get some more sleep. I lay down while I am listening to some soothing music. I don´t want to have any more nightmares.

Immediately when I fall asleep though- I find myself feeling very anxious and a bit scared, but not so much for myself but for someone else. I find myself dreaming again. This time I feel like I am in older times and I am on my way into a room, when I hear a commotion and a man that is screaming. He sounds like he’s drunk and very angry. The anxiousness is increasing and I find myself moving faster. When I get into the room I see the man reaching for a fire poke and he´s suddenly strikes against a woman . She screams and then he strikes her again-over the back and I hear the bones cracking.

Without even thinking I rush ahead trying to help her.  As I lunge forward I feel a burning pain in my chest. The woman who has been unconscious for a moment now looks at me with frightened eyes, but there is also something else in those eyes-is it love? I feel an immense love and tenderness for her and as I fall down  on the floor I reach for her hand, but she is suddenly lunging herself forward and I hear a gunshot. She falls next to me, but she looks at me and now she´s reaching for my hand. As I look at her holding her hand I recognize her, or parts of her anyway. Before I can know why she feels familiar we both pass out-or die I guess. Once again I wake up screaming from the dream, but when I wake up I know that the woman in the dream is very much like the woman I met when she came through the portal.

Is this story something that really has happened or is it a figment of my imagination? I need to put the pieces of the puzzles together-I need to know more about this woman and also see if I can find any leads to the woman I saw at the beach. Maybe if I found out if there’s any truth to the dream  about the woman who died, maybe her family history can give me clues about the woman I want to meet today? Does that make any sense?There is no way two women can be so alike without being related in some way. But where do I start to find out? Is there a way to find out, since I don´t even know her name? I know this is all a long shot, but I have a gut feeling that this could be a way to find out who my dream partner or soulmate is.

I sat myself down by the computer again and decide to write to my friends about this too and see if any of them can help me with the search for this woman -I mean the woman who I saw on the beach, so now I have two ways of looking for clues. One is to see if there is any mention of a woman getting shot by her elderly husband-it must have been quite the scandal at that time. It looked like they come from a family with lots of money and connections and history is often written about the nobility or high class people throughout history. “Ordinary” people are harder to find information about, but this case should be easier. 

The other way of looking for the woman of my dreams of today is to write to my friends and also do research about any weird or “magical” things, or people that have experienced stuff like that. I am a very rational person, but maybe there is such a thing as magic….? Or am I just delusional? I am still not sure, but at least now I have a plan.

Episode 11: Raven

Waking up

As I slowly wake up from passing out, I smell  herbal tea and also coffee. Liza stands in front of me with two mugs in her hand. Drink this first and then this, she says as she helps me up in a sitting position. She hands me the herbal tea first-chamomille, orange flower and mint I think and after that she hands me the coffee-strong and dark roasted. 

Liza and Adrian help me to the chair after I have taken sips of both the tea and the coffee.

-What happened? Liza asks.

-I thought you were dead, Adrian interjects.

-I don´t know, but I got pulled through a portal again, I answer.

-Again? Adrian asks.

-Yes, it’s the second time it has happened. I usually get a feeling that a portal is opening, but this is the second time I get pulled through to somewhere unknown, unfamiliar and without me having a slightest chance of controlling it. It´s really unnerving and that is why I try to find out about my lineage and the “powers” or gifts my ancestors have had.

-Ah, I understand, he says. Do you want me to see if I can find out anything about this phenomenon? It could be interesting for my research, he says.

-If you find something, it would be really helpful for me, I answer. But please be discreet and don´t talk about this with just anyone, I ask him. I don´t know, but my intuition says it´s important that only a few people know about this, I try to explain to him. But thank you, I say with a smile

-Ok, understood, he smiles back reassuringly.

You may wonder why I trust him, but my intuition doesn´t give off any red flags in either Adrian’s or Liza’s behaviour or in their energy field. That’s also why I told them about them being one of the mythical 144 000 couples. Otherwise I wouldn’t have told them anything. I have learned to trust my intuition with my life and I trust them both.

To be continued…

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This video is from my YouTube channel where I sometimes make oracle-and tarot readings in short video format. I am currently studying the tarot under Moon Magic Tarot-a YouTube creator. Watch the video below if you feel called to it-then there may be a message for you. My readings are timeless and when you find them-they may apply to you and your circumstances. Use your discernment and only take things that feels right for you. Enjoy!